Wednesday, August 25, 2010

Football to the Rescue

I seems like it's been years now since the most brutal sport (save UFC) is back upon us. For those 9-5ers football season is the time of year when you have a quasi-excusable excuse to spend all Sunday at a bar, or plopped on the couch without nagging from the wife; a true man's dream.

Sunday to men everywhere is sacred. Not so much any more because it's God's day of rest, but really Man's day of laziness. From golf outing to watching the all the football games possible with DirecTV NFL Sunday Ticket, this is indeed women best not mess with or else the wrath of man is liable to come out in full force.

Like anything else in life people get addicted to rituals, whether it's smoking, drinking, or needing a day to forget the six other days in the week.

Now with Fantasy Football, you can literally watch TV and continue monitoring how well your fantasy team is doing in real-time. Truly a miracle of God. I myself, have joined a fantasy team for the first time in a few years and am pretty pumped about it. What did I say I wasn't like every other man on Sunday? Hell no. I needs my football.

Just remember you married couples out there; there is no better way to completely destroy your marriage than by spending your free time on things that are not family & wife compatible (i.e. football). But for those of you that are looking for a way to get rid of your other half. Football obsession is a great way to go.

Once your woman starts nagging you about being completely engulfed in football, and couldn't care less about the family, pour on some more gasoline. Tell her football makes you happy in a way she never could. Relationship over!

If you take my advice and it works, please email me.

I wonder why I'm still not married?

No comments:

Post a Comment

Criminal of the Year 2017 Goes To...