Tuesday, June 15, 2010

Los Angeles Vacation Rocked

My fellow readers, I am a California native and am currently in the city of Los Angeles. Therefore, I have the honored privelage of telling you why so many people congregate to the L.A. area en masse.

Everything is out here.

1. Beaches: You have some of the most beautiful beaches on the entire Pacific Coast. Venice "muscle" beach, my hometown beach (where I was born) is still packed with the some of the most beautiful people in the world. California definelety puts the "forn" in fornicating. People ride bicycles for pleasure and to commute. There is a skater park that rivals a half-pipe there because of it's sleep design. The boardwalk is full of street entertainers, local merchants selling everything from sunglasses, medical marijuana doctors, dispensaries, bong shops, and everything in between. The food is standard American for the most part and reminds one of a simplier time when people enjoyed the beach. Surfers are seen in the early morning and evening for the tides. Women sunbath topless. It truly is a microcosm of Los Angles.

2. Hollywood: For those that are mesmerized by the movies, stars, rockers, and every kind of celebrity on Earth, this is where they are. That means you have all the 1st Class amenities very few cities around the world can boast. You truly can get anything out here.

3. It's a desert made to look like it's "kinda-green" so you don't feel like you're in the desert. The benefits are that L.A. is sunny everyday for the most part, like a desert, because it is one. If your feeling depressed, come out to Southern California and let the Vitimin B, and UV rays do something special to your overall happiness and spreading melanoma.

4. From Geeks to Ganstas: No matter what type of person you are there is a place for you. From the gays, to the ultra geeks who speak in ruby on rails, to the gangbangers. Everyone is accepted here. Hippies are not beaten by cops, Mexicans and Blacks are not abused like they once were. And, the strangest part of L.A. is that everyone seems to be pretty happy. Execept for the people murdered on a somewhat regular basis. What a strange place indeed.

Tomorrow I voyage back to my humble East-Coast abode. Things will be much quieter, but sometimes that's nice as well.

P.S. I'm sorry this blog wasn't too funny. So here is a joke to attempt to show goodwill that I promise the next blog will be histerical. JOKE METER: Midly Offensive

A boss is interviewing three female candidates for an investment firm. The the boss asks candidate what would you invest in gold, oil, or stocks and why? She says gold and gives a great financial response.

The second candidate says oil, and gives a great answer as well. The third candidate says stocks and equally responded to her reasoning well.

Who did the boss hire?

The one with the big tits.

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